scarylooking / theresamayjs

TheresaMayjs

TheresaMay.js is a simple JavaScript framework (why not) that can be quickly deployed in situations where the real Theresa May can't be bothered to show up.

The framework attempts to emulate Mrs May by first disregarding the question, then smashing together a bunch of randomly generated strings around a party line.

The code has been poorly thought though and hastily put together under the influence of alcohol so in that regard it is very much like the Conservative Manifesto. It also contains absolutely no costings.

Demo

License

Commercial licenses for TheresaMay.js are available to purchase. I will be announcing pricing after a systematic consultation with various arbitrary people down the pub, but what I can say is that there will be a cap of £100,000. There has always been a cap. Anyone who says there wasn’t is presiding over a coalition of chaos.

Usage

Simple. Include TheresaMay.js then create a new instance...

var theresaMayBot = new theresaMay();

Ask it a question...

var response = theresaMayBot.askQuestion("Why do you hate everything that is good and right in the world?")
console.log(response)

And get a response back...

What we have done in government, and what we will continue do in government is to put record levels of funding into leopard print shoes.

theresamayjs's Issues

Strict mode

Not all of this repo is in strict mode. I think realism would be enhanced if it was.

Union Flag

An actual bug - its the union flag not the union jack ....

Please make a twitter bot!

It would be such a laugh. You would probably gain quite a lot of traction =D

You could have people attempt to interrogate her...

Licence should take ownership of house if payment not possible

Equality methods should be overridden.

Pollutes the global namespace / doesn't work when required

When using theresamayjs in your application it exposes potentially-dangerous methods to the global environment.

Additionally, theresamayjs is not compatible with AMD techniques – indeed, it is not possible to require theresamayjs.

Code is not stable and does not use strong typing

Not as strong and stable as claimed

Backdoor access for admins.

There is a chance that terrorists might use the library to communicate. We should therefore add backdoor access for admins so that we can control what pornography they can watch.

Suggest avoiding any use of major version numbers

Semantic versioning is normally of the format <MAJOR>.<MINOR>.<patch>, however given the current minority Theresa May's party has and that it is not strong nor stable, I would suggest that this project not increment the major version number as long as this trend of instability continues.

Promise support?

When you ask a question she should reply with an empty promise.